


The Lone Gunman Have Secrets (Even from each other)

by ladygray99



Category: The X-Files
Genre: Cross-Posted on Tumblr, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-12-05
Updated: 2009-12-05
Packaged: 2017-10-04 04:27:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 817
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25954
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ladygray99/pseuds/ladygray99
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Scully? The Lone Gunman?</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Lone Gunman Have Secrets (Even from each other)

**Author's Note:**

> Though I never signed up for it this came out of Julie's Rare-Het 'Behind Every Good Woman lies a trail of men' challenge. Feedback and archiving are both welcomed. Never thought I'd do this.

Scully has secrets even Mulder doesn’t know. The Lone Gunmen have secrets they keep from each other.

 

_Byers_

 The thing about conferences on obscure topics is that they’re small and there’s an impression that you have to socialize with your fellow conference goers.  The other thing is that hotels will try to cram two or three obscure conferences under the roof at the same time.

 Scully was working her way into inebriation at the hotel bar.

 “Agent Scully?” She choked on her drink and spun around.

 “Byers? What are you doing here?”  Scully quickly looked around the bar for the other two.

 “I’m here for the other conference, don’t worry the boys are back in DC.”  Scully sighed.  She could basically handle Buyers on his own, the sanest if possibly most fanatical of the three musketeers.  “Can I get you a drink?”  Scully smiled.

 “Sure”

 Scotch and soda, whiskies sours, little pink girly drinks, Scully makes Byers get one for himself as well.  Talking about nothing, stumbling up to the hotel room, talking about something.  Sober rational Scully knows one of them will be crying before long.  They fumble with clothes but no lips are kissed, that would be too much, that would be something they might remember in the morning.

 For clumsy drunken sex it wasn’t too bad.  Scully’s had worse.  She got off at least.  Byers was crying by the time he came.  She let him cry himself out, head in her lap, petting the thinning hair.  When he’s asleep Scully gathers up her clothes and slips down the hall to her own room.  She finds she sleeps well and wakes up feeling far better than she should.

 “Magic anti hangover sex.” She mumbles to herself in the shower. “That’s one for the X-Files”

 

_Langly_

 The thing Scully never realized about Langly is that he’s actually funny.  They’re on stake out, day stake out, day stake out of suspects that never come out during the day.

 “So the gray alien says to the green alien you can keep the bald monkey but the gorilla in the penguin suit has got to go.” 

 Scully laughed.  Ok it wasn’t really that funny, and she realizes that she’s become one of maybe ten people on earth, who would get it, but she laughed anyways and Langly keeps going.

 “…so this CIA guy, an FBI guy and a DEA guy walk into a bar…” 

 Scully nearly sprays coffee out of her nose. Langly keeps going.

 “…so I said to the cop ‘how can the alien be illegal if we can’t even admit he exists?’”

 Scully was holding her sides shaking in silent laughter.  It actually hurt.  By this time Langly was on a chair.

 “…so the final outcome is that Ben Affleck’s fame is actually warping the laws of time and space.”

 20 minutes later as they’re pressed against the wall Langly is still cracking jokes quietly into her ear.  Scully finds out that if she comes while laughing the endorphin rush is killer.

 A week later she drags Mulder to a comedy club for her birthday.

 “Why did you give those guys your card, Scully?”

 “After you get us kicked out of the FBI I’m thinking of becoming an agent.”

 

_Frohike_

  
Scully was beyond pissed.  If Mulder didn’t die on his current wild goose chase Scully was going to kill him.

 “Just run these papers by the Gunmen. Please Scully”

 Scully fumed as she banged on the door.  ‘_Please Scully_’ the little whine rang in her ears.  ‘And when did I become _Scully’,_ she though.  ‘_When did I stop being Dana or even Agent Scully. Ok Mulder is Mulder because Fox is a stupid name but why do I have to be Suclly?  So we can be Mulder and Scully? What’s wrong with Scully and Mulder?_’  She banged on the door again.  The little speaker crackled to life.

 “Password please?”

 “Open up you pathetic little paranoid toad before I kick the door in and shoot you.” The door swings open. Frohike stands there looking flustered.

 “Scully!”  Scully storms past dropping the stack of papers on the nearest flat surface.

 “I have a first name you know.” She snapped.  Frohike smiled.

 “Dana.” Scully looks at him. “Delightful Dana.” Scully raises an eyebrow “Oh most beauteous Dana of the crimson hair. Dana with skin of cream and eyes of ice.”  Scully reaches out and solidly whacks Frohike up the side of the head, the way her mother used to whack Bill when he was mouthing off.  However, judging by the way Frohike hits the floor, Scully used a good deal more force.

 Frohike smiled.

 “Dana of the warrior heart and noble spirit.”

 Scully would later tell herself that it’s not rape if the other person never objects but judging by the state she left the little hacker in she’d be surprised if he ever thought of her that way again.

 


End file.
